My testimony

“He brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay…”
My road to God and true faith hasn’t been straightforward.

Early church upbringing
I was born in Poland where at that time, 99% of people were Catholics. My family wasn’t particularly very religious,
more keeping traditions and various religious events as a family tradition.
In fact, my mother was quite anti church towards the institution,
and I guess I’ve learnt this dislike towards the church from her.
The only person with true faith from the heart was my grandad in my family.
My grandmother was very religious but this was more out of her superficial need to “show off”
as we had a priest in the family. So very early in my life I got to find out how church was operating “from the kitchen”.
On some Sundays after the service, we would go and visit my uncle where he lived in the church house with other priests.
For me, going to church on a Sunday was a torture. I didn’t like the service, it was repetitive, monotonous and quite confusing at times.
I was just going as everyone was going… Until one Sunday as a teenager at that time, I looked around and while observing people,
I realized that all those people were rushing to confess their sins to the priest and after the confession,
leaving an envelope to the priest, so that they can go “with the clean heart” and accept eucharist (communion).
However, all this cleanness would stop on Monday morning and they would go back to the same behavior.
I felt such a hypocrisy and double standards.
Those people were only doing this to show off and all those priests were happily accepting those envelopes…
My dislike towards the church started. It was also a time when a lot of scandals were coming out from Catholic churches
across the country. Pedophilia, child molestation, relationships between priests…
My distrust towards churches grew and I just stopped going.
If I had to go, I would make sure I’m by the door or even outside and I’m just in the church environment but not particularly participating.

Faith from childhood
However, my dislike was only towards the church, not towards God or my faith.
From early age I had a strong faith and as a little girl, I got to learn about Jesus. I loved all those colorful Bible stories,
and my favorite was Moses story when he was left in a basket. At one point I wanted to be a nun to be closer to God
and I was taking evening prayer very seriously. Those were the prayers I’ve learnt at school and one of those prayers was to your
guardian angel, which of course at that time, I didn’t know we weren’t supposed to be praying to angels, but of course
the deception from religion and church was widespread.
When I left the church and just stopped going, I felt some sort of relief. I didn’t have particularly good experiences,
perhaps because of my apprehension, I always experience some negativity from priests or people at the church.
I would ask uncomfortable questions or point out hypocrisy and make them uncomfortable.
I viewed church as a materialistic institution that had nothing to do with God and true faith from early years.
But my faith towards God didn’t disappear and I didn’t need a lot of evidence to know God existed, I just knew.

Secular upbringing
Our house was quite secular and open minded.
As I mentioned before, my mother didn’t particularly like the church and only went to church twice a year, for Christmas and Easter.
We kept other church events like Ash Wednesday, Lentil, some Mary devotional during May… But we never had any conversations about faith,
I never heard my parents talking about God, praying or putting any importance into faith.
When I was 19, I moved to England and I was excited to be surrounded by different cultures, religions and nationalities.
I was a very curious and open-minded person and I was very interested in hearing about different religions.
I guess growing up in the country where pretty much everyone around you followed the same religion, maybe expressing it differently,
but having the same traditions and rituals, so when I moved to the UK and met some Muslims, some Buddhists, Protestants, Hindu believers,
it all sounded new and exciting. I started to question my religion and exploring possibility of maybe changing…
But at that time, I was with my then boyfriend who was also from Poland and he was very traditional so there was no chance of exploring it further.
While living in the UK, we got married in a traditional polish wedding in the Catholic church and we had our son.
All sounded great and traditional, but we were quite a secular and worldly couple. My husband had a bar where I was also working,
we were partying, drinking, sometimes drugs were involved, being very much in the world and not even mentioning the word
church or God. During studies I started some modelling and it quickly turned into glamour modelling and topless modelling.
Again, I was quite open-minded and I didn’t mind showing off my body. My glamour career stopped when I got pregnant
and after having my son I got back to commercial modelling focusing on commercial, bridal and beauty work.

Trouble in paradise – divorce
However, our marriage didn’t last and after five years we eventually separated and got divorced,
while trying to keep it as painless as possible for our son. During that time, I felt this need of some sort of spirituality.
Up until then I was living in reality, in the world and I was quite desensitized to any form of spirituality or strong faith.
God was in the background but not in the full front of my attention. But I felt empty and I didn’t know what it was…
After the breakup of our marriage, to distract myself, I got into more partying, meeting new people, I was very…well… sexually liberated.
I got into some bad relationships or situationships, where I was constantly cheated on, used and treated badly.
Every other guy would be a typical player and I absolutely hated those games. All I wanted was a true relationship with someone
and I deeply needed love. I quickly realized that I was looking for a greener grass while not appreciating my previous grass (my marriage)
that wasn’t actually that bad at all. I was very happy in my marriage, but my ex husband met someone and we both realized that
we weren’t good for each other. So, I was looking for his replacement and hoping that I can still create something meaningful.
But what I’ve experienced were lies, games, cheating and artificial grass.

The start of New Age practices
To occupy my thoughts from this difficult time during my divorce, I went to a networking seminar about businesses
with hopes to spark an idea about business and it happened that there was a meditation from a well known Hindu lady
that was an expert in meditation. And during that meditation I felt something…
I broke down and cried, I was so confused but I liked the fact that it grabbed my emotions. What was that…?
I wanted to explore it further.
During that time my friend was very much into spirituality and New Age practices.
I was the one living in reality and she was the spiritual one. She would start some subjects on spirituality with me before,
but at that time I wasn’t into it at all or just didn’t have the need. However, after this experience I was open – minded,
she recommended me books like The Secret about manifestations, The Alchemist, The Power of Now… and I got hooked into the subject.
I am the person that whenever I get into a new subject, I really need to know everything and to dig deeper into the subject,
to review different sides of it. I started my research and getting deeper into it. I’ve always been into astrology
and horoscopes were a big part of my weekly ritual where I needed to know what could potentially happen.
Looking back, in Catholicism there are a lot of various rituals that had some roots in paganism or witchcraft,
so astrology and horoscopes didn’t seem to be anything bad. I remember my grandmother would use pendulum to discover
any weak points in the body or potential diseases. She would swing it around the body and trust it more than what doctor would say.
She also had a friend who was a medium and my mum used tarot card reading services as well.
So all this New Age stuff didn’t feel too foreign and my exploration into Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism started.

Getting deeper into “spirituality”
My astrology hobby got more intense, to the point I was the person to go to, to find out when would be the next Mercury retrograde,
what impact planets have on us, moon rituals, manifestations, manifestation boards, crystals, sage, releasing,
healing with crystals and then moved to tarot cards.
During pandemic, my friend who introduced me to The Secret, Alchemist etc., showed me tarot card readings on Youtube.
I said I don’t really believe in tarot, but she showed me reading on my astrology sign and I was surprised how accurate it was!
I was hooked… I started to learn about tarot and of course, as it is with me, I needed to know everything about it
and be able to do readings on people. I started practicing it on myself first and then moved to other people.
I was going deeper and deeper into witchcraft without realizing it!
This is the problem many people make, they trust their feelings more than the truth and the word of God.
Because if something making you feel happy, it must be good for you, right? Well, not necessarily…
The funny thing is I thought I was actually getting closer to God through those practices.
I didn’t see anything bad about it because I thought I was cooperating with angels who are our helpers.
I mean as a little girl I was praying to my guardian angel so this wasn’t much different.
Completely oblivious to the truth about divination and ignorant towards the word of God, in my mind I was growing spiritually
and getting closer to God. My skills in tarot grew quickly that I started having comments from others that
maybe I was a witch in my previous life… However, I didn’t see this as witchcraft because from movies I’ve learnt that
witches were bad with bad and impure intentions and what I was doing was healing… I had my daily rituals that involved some meditation,
tarot card reading, crystals, sage. Some monthly rituals with moon rituals, burning and releasing, manifestations…
Some of my friends were even saying to me that maybe I am a witch or someone from my family was a witch and that’s why
I have a gift to read tarot cards…
Those practices were helping me with my healing during and after my divorce, they had a positive impact on my mental health…
as I thought… But the more I was “healing”, the more healing I needed, the more layers were there to uncover and to heal again…
It was a never-ending cycle.
Moreover, New Age practices were practiced and promoted by many celebrities, movies and music.
Growing up, all of my favorite movies, shows or series had something to do with “magic” and divination.
We were very much conditioned and brainwashed to accept it and not question it at all.
As long as you’re not doing any voodoo or bad spells on people, you are “healing” …. Right?
Well that was my ignorant thinking back then.

Things started to go wrong
Spirituality grew massively during pandemic and lockdowns.
I remember thinking around 2021-2022 why everyone suddenly is into this and all social medial platforms were flooded
with various accounts, posts and videos on those topics. It felt too much, too available, too secular…
In 2020 where my practices increased during lockdowns, some weird things started to happen in my life that increased me
being suspicious. At that time, I was thinking it’s a weird coincidence, universe is trying to teach me a lesson, I need to work
on this area, every kind of possible excuse to not even consider that what I was doing was wrong.
I mean, the environment and people around me didn’t mind me doing this or were doing this themselves,
so I didn’t have anyone to point out to me that this was wrong.
Not to mention that the last time I had Bible in my hands was over 20 years ago.
God was trying to get to me from 2020 but I was completely ignoring it and my spiritual practices were only increasing.
Looking back, all those practices and rituals were absolutely crazy and pointless and only costed my time, money
and taking me further and further away from God. Not to mention my sexual liberation led me to start my Only Fans account.
At that time, I needed quick financial injection, and I gave myself 6 months to do it. I was very careful with not using my real name
and just living an alter ego night life. As my brain got accustomed to always finding excuses, I was thinking it’s not much different
to my previous topless modelling and that I’m not doing anything wrong as many women do it…
Only Fans boomed during lockdowns, so it was a quick cash win. And as I promised myself, after 5 months I left.
I didn’t want to tempt the circumstances and for anyone from my family to find out.
But as I mentioned, weird and uncomfortable circumstances started to occur in my life and I started to slowly pay attention.
Before, I was talking to the universe and thinking angels around me are helping me, but then in 2022 I started directing
my conversations to God. One day out of frustration that another uncomfortable situation occurred after previous three situations,
I started to think it’s not normal, so I said: “God please show me what is happening” and then… I started receiving dreams!

Answers in my dreams
God was so patient with me!
Trying to get my attention through music, people quoting scripture to me in random conversations,
me finding Bible in one of the hotels and thinking: “hmm I haven’t seen this in a long time…” But still, I would just ignore it!
But when things went wrong and I asked God for help out of frustration, I started receiving dreams.
Those were very intense and clear dreams showing me the person behind my problems and I started paying attention.
I received three dreams in a row, all different but all showing me this person in a negative light, yet this person
was super nice towards me… so I started my personal investigation.
It is crazy that once you decide to go on a side with God, God will cooperate with you and help you find the truth.
You just need to open yourself up to this truth.
At that time, I stopped my witchcraft practices, but I haven’t repented just yet.
After stopping those practices…it was as if all hell broke loose.
All those “angels” I was working with came against me. I started having sleepless nights, felt breathing on my face constantly,
I had nightmares constantly, I had flies following me constantly in January where you don’t really have flies in the UK,
they would appear literally magically… I felt like someone was watching me constantly and I was scared I will lose my mind
as no one was believing me at all. I mean I could even see foggy clouds appearing in my room and swishing around.
It was a scary and lonely time.

Sleep paralysis
One night, when God showed me that the person from my dreams was doing witchcraft on me, I felt this enormous fear that fell upon me.
I was shaking as a leaf and sweating; I couldn’t sleep with my lights off so I decided I will leave them on and close my eyes.
I felt breathing on my face again and as I was falling asleep, I felt as if I was falling quickly, just like on a rollercoaster
but I couldn’t stop it or open my eyes. I couldn’t even breathe. I was thinking in my mind I need to stop it and I need to breath but I couldn’t…
I didn’t have any vision apart from darkness and lights quickly changing as if I was on a roller coaster ride.
It was very weird and scary feeling, I felt lightheaded too and not in a control at all. I don’t know how long it lasted,
probably few min but it felt like a long ride! Suddenly I opened my eyes and realized I was in my room and I am okay.
The only thing I could describe it as if something ripped my soul out of my body and my soul was falling to the ground…

January 2023 – Saved by Jesus
When I woke up, the first thing I did was cry and say: Jesus please save me! And this was the moment something broke in me.
Just this name – Jesus, was able to break something! I felt on my knees and in that moment all this condemnation and realization
what I was doing came to me! I realized that all those practices were wrong, that I was against God, that spirituality and witchcraft
is not something you can just play with, that perhaps my soul was heading towards hell in that moment of falling and I was separated from God.
That’s why this enormous fear overtook me! I have no idea how I was able to say and call Jesus, other than my spirit knew…
that is the only way.
My first thought that came to me was to take a Bible…but I didn’t even own a Bible!
So, I put some worship music to calm myself down and the next day I ordered a Bible. How crazy to think that a Christian
wouldn’t even own a Bible. But this is how far I was from God at that time. I decided to read scripture every night
to calm myself down from all those night attacks. As I got the Bible, I wasn’t sure if I just needed to start reading from the start
or just New Testament…so I opened the Bible randomly and it went to the book of Hosea chapter 2.
As I was reading about unfaithful wife, I felt even more condemnation than before, crying my eyes out.
I just felt so bad, all those witchcraft practices, all this promiscuity, sex work, ignorance towards the word of God…
and my repentance started. I was also amazed how much wisdom was in the Bible, and I questioned myself
why I didn’t reach out for the Bible before! I was so into other religions and reading a lot about them but not even wanting to know my own…

Repentance
My repentance and deliverance started and it was a long process…
I was purging a lot of guilt, emotions, shame, condemnations, while still having night attacks and demonic visitations.
That equipped me to learn how to fight spiritual warfare, while learning about the word of God, learning how to worship God,
fasting, praying and receiving understanding through the Holy Spirit. And this is when my eyes started to open up
about the deception I was in while being in the Catholic church.
But finally, I came to the truth!
The truth that Bible is the truth, God is real, Jesus is our Savior, and I only need that one source of knowledge – the Bible.
My search for the truth and trying out other religions and practices stopped there.
I now understand and this was such a positive discovery for me!
When I was younger, I wanted to believe in the Bible but some stories were so out of reach to our human reasoning
or understanding so it was easier to just reject it. It didn’t help also that no one from my family believed that the Bible was true
and that the stories were true. It was something we have to learn, know but not really believe that it’s true…which was confusing to me.
Catholic church made is more confusing adding all this information from Catechism like sacraments,
Mary worship, purgatory etc. Also, being in secular world didn’t help too where Christianity and Jesus were mocked,
and Buddhism or Hinduism were glorified. Christianity had a bad reputation, and I must admit I was one of those people
who thought all Christians were judgmental, close minded and too nice for any intellectual conversations.

Catholic deception
After discovering my truth, my research and learning about the word of God started.
And I was surprised how easy it was for me to understand it, how come it wasn’t the case before? Well, Holly Spirit…
I didn’t understand it at first but the more I was reading, the more I understood.
I decided I will brainwash myself with the word of God, as the world brainwashed me with all this “magic” and New Age practices,
I needed to replace all this knowledge with the word of God. However, I felt that maybe doing it on my own is not good
and I need to join…. the church. Wait, me so anti-church going back to church again?
Well, I wasn’t planning to go back to the Catholic church, especially after reading Exodus and realizing
that the second commandment was taken away from the Catholic religion and tenth commandment split into two to make it up for 10…
And this is quite major because second commandment talks about idolatry and the whole Catholic church is…well idolatry!
I also questioned Catholic church devotion to Mary and praying to Mary while Mary has a tiny mention in the Bible
and it was very clearly highlighted that Jesus is the only mediator between God. So why we have been devoting
the whole month of May to Mary? And why all those prayers? What about the purgatory? Nothing in the Bible…
What about seven sacraments? What about calling priests the Father where Bible is clear that we only should call God the Father…
You get my picture. All those truths and realizations about Catholic church started to come out!
And in my mind, I thought I knew it! I knew why I was feeling off about this church… I was right! My spirit was right.

Converting to Christianity
So which church should I join? Do I want to do this? I mean the Bible talks about the Sabbath and all churches are on Sunday…
Is it right? I was terrified to be deceived again! I just discovered the truth, I didn’t want to accidently get away from the truth again…
So I looked at the Christian churches and…wow so many different denominations!
Which one is true, which one is the right one…why so many different ones?
So, during my online research I clicked at one church and enquired. And I quickly got a call from the church
where I thought…hmm so different to the Catholic ways, they call you personally… but I was open to listen.
It seemed and sounded so friendly, until they sent me a book of Mormons to read before joining and being baptized.
Ooops, another deception?
I decided to not join the church, it will be safer rather that getting deceived…
But that feeling of I need help and I need other people in faith wouldn’t leave me so I tried my research again.
I went to few churches in my city and eventually decided to stay at one Evangelical church that was focusing on the Bible.
I joined the Bible study group and getting into Christian community. I felt as an odd one as I couldn’t find anyone with similar experiences.
Everyone seemed to be Christians since birth and never departing, never questioning and no one believed in my witchcraft experiences
and night attacks. I just didn’t feel support and at times felt some judgement, but I also thought perhaps it’s just my feelings
because I was self-condemning myself for a while. So I decided to give it a go and explore.
Things were going very well, I was at the church for a year and I was surrounded by Christian community,
exploring the word of God and growing closer to God. All this while I was continuing my spiritual warfare prayers,
exploring the word on my own in my free time and as I promised myself – brainwashing myself with the word of God.
I mean what can go wrong, right…?

Deliverance
Part of my repentance and deliverance was fasting and praying.
I discovered that without fasting, my deliverance prayers weren’t working and I needed to cleanse myself from all those previous
witchcraft practices, false religion and all this ignorance towards the word of God. The church I was in didn’t believe in deliverance
and they only believed that once you believe in Jesus, everything is wiped away by the blood of Jesus Christ.
We just need to rejoice and live happily ever after!
Well, it wasn’t my experience… I was wondering why people are not having those attacks,
why they are not fasting, why no one is mentioning about warfare prayers or the enemy?!
The only focus was on the good news that you are saved by grace. This is of course true, but not the whole truth!
I experienced heavy attacks for months and during my deliverance, I manifested a lot of unclean spirits.
I was visited by incubus spirits, I had demonic dreams, I saw shadows…
I couldn’t even speak about it with people or my family as they though I was getting mad.
One night, during my fasting and praying around 3am, I started to vomit like crazy and my stomach was empty from not eating
so this couldn’t be stomach bug or similar. I quickly learnt that in the same way demons enter –
through ear gates (music), eye gates (movies), mouth gate (food), sex gate (sex or masturbation) they also have to exit by one of those gates!
After some time, I got used to my usual night fights and whenever I had a calm night, I was praising God for it
because it wasn’t normal for me. Did I feel tired and thinking maybe it was better for me before?
Yes, it crossed my mind but I knew if I backslide, it will be worse than before, because the scripture talks about demons leaving
and taking 7 worse demons and entering again. I didn’t want to give them any chance to do so!
I had to fast regularly and pray at night often until 3am to engage in spiritual warfare.
Every time I felt unclean spirits entered me, because after some time I could actually feel it, it was usually as suddenly
feeling lightheaded for few seconds, sudden ear ringing or ear blockage, shivering in the body or just one part of the body,
I had to pray and demand them to leave. I’ve learnt about the power of our words and it didn’t matter if I sinned or not,
attacks would happen regardless. Before I would connect it with sin or backsliding, I would feel guilty and want to improve
my spiritual “cleanliness”, however after some time I discovered it didn’t matter if I was spiritually clean or not,
they would attack regardless. And always use ways to enter through family members or life situations.
At some point I wanted to just hide in a cave and not participate in normal daily activities,
but I’ve learnt to deal with it and live with it and most importantly to fight it.
Because God is my rock “who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle.”
God will not take away those battles from you for a reason. Even though you would want to just hide and not deal with it,
God is teaching you to go through it, learn to fight it and become stronger in the process.
As annoying and tiring as it’s been, it’s also been a blessing that sent me on a speed learning course about spirituality.
I had to learn enemy’s tactics, which to be honest has always been the same, just under different circumstances.
The enemy didn’t improve or change much, we just live in different times and enemy is using different tools but the principles are the same.
I’ve also discovered how much fasting is important in the spiritual battle.
As much as I love food and hate fasting, I had to engage into this practice and teach my body to regularly be okay without food.
When I decided to fast for 40 days, this has been the hardest task I had to do. First week was a battle, second week was a tantrum,
but third and fourth week started to become easier and easier. I was surprised that the closer I got to the 40th day mark,
I could go on for longer actually but I started to think about food so much I had to break it.
On the contrary, I had a lot of energy, mental clarity and I have received the most revelations during fasting. I
had personal and wordily revelations, things started to become much clearer and I could interpret scripture and see connections
between different books in the Bible. This was also a time when for the first time I received an audible sign from God in my dream.
It was incredible and scary. Scary because God wasn’t very happy with me and I had to increase my prayer.
However weirdly during my fasting I felt quite empty emotionally in my mind which was difficult for me to actually pray,
I would read Psalms mainly because I couldn’t fully connect. Fasting is definitely challenging task and we don’t realize
how much we relay on food and how food can cloud our mind as well.
Whether we want it or not, the food is a blockage to our spiritual life and true connection with God.
Fasting really helped me and it was the only thing that could free me from those unclean spirits,
however as I mentioned, they would always look for ways to come back, therefore I was treating fasting as a regular detox from demons.
Just in the same way we have to from time to time detox from specific foods, bacteria or parasites, we have to cleanse spiritually,
because those demons can really hide without our awareness. That is why this Christian opinion
that Christians can’t have demons was untrue to me, because demons don’t look at labels or religions.
And yes, Holy Spirit can dwell in along with demons because we are dealing with spirits. Some people think that
they are saved when they aren’t actually saved and the label of being Christian is really not important in spiritual world.
That is why I started to feel uneasy about the church or what I’ve learnt spiritually versus
what church was teaching and preaching about, it wasn’t matching to my personal experiences.

Sugar- coated Christianity
My time at the church started to reveal that maybe there is no perfect church or denomination
and I can’t relay on the church feeding me spiritual knowledge.
Church time for me was to worship God and to be around other believers but then I found that I couldn’t even speak about
those difficult subjects as well. For me it was normal to practice spiritual warfare prayers,
fasting, talking about the enemy’s tactics and demonic oppression and not ignoring it or sweeping under the carpet.
And this is what I was missing from the churches. Churches seems to be sugar-coated, selective in information
and only focusing on the Gospel of Grace.
This is when I started to get deeper into the word of God and into the Gospel of Grace to then discover
that it was actually false!
I started to be quite judgmental towards the church and Christianity and becoming this judgmental Christian
I used to criticize, however this time I was criticizing Christianity.
Churches were avoiding to talk about spiritual warfare, highlighting the importance of fasting, or rejecting the flesh.
I started feeling off about the church again. Every time I mentioned something a little different to just Gospel of Grace,
I was looked at like a weird one. People started ignoring that information, because it wasn’t aligning
with their sugar coated Christian life. Church was more interested in organizing dinners and picnics together
rather than fasting. And pastor were mis interpreting of the scripture according to me.
I just couldn’t ignore it anymore and I started to question leaving the church again.
I noticed that a lot of people were relaying to be spoon fed by priests and pastors at the churches.
Pastors were for them sent by God and their knowledge was right and therefore we should always check with them
before coming to our own conclusions. It was the same as suggesting your conclusions are wrong
because you don’t have the label of a pastor and therefore you always have to check with them
and if your interpretation is different to their interpretation, then yours is automatically wrong.
I knew I was missing out on vital spiritual information and self-realizations if I continued being in that environment.
I just felt that I wasn’t growing and the messages at the church weren’t aligned to what I was going through.
Not to mention that my understanding or interpretation of some of the scriptures were different to some pastors.
I was surprised that some people would just accept what the pastor said, because of the label – pastor – and the fact they studied the Bible for years, without trusting your own judgements and understanding. As my personality is quite inquisitive and having no attachments to labels
and institutions, I would just question their interpretation more and more.
Bible studies started to feel uncomfortable and Sunday services started to be a dread again…
Oh no, the same feeling as with the Catholic church, what’s happening??
I was also questioning myself, maybe I am overly critical towards churches, maybe it’s not that important
and I just need to continue as it’s important to worship God and be around other believers?
But my spirit wouldn’t let me just leave it and accept it. I mean my soul is at stake! What if they are wrong?
What if my feelings are right? My intuition would always reveal to me what I needed to know,
as it was during my Catholic church times, so inner pressure was growing.

The proper worship – Sabbath
It was during my long fast that I started feeling closer to God and being able to distinguish His voice.
During my New Age era, the positive aspect I took from it was to get to know enemy’s tactics, not being ignorant to those tactics
and being spiritually sensitive to signs. And so, once I developed this ability, I started to see signs from God more and more.
One time I started to see number 66 everywhere… It was pretty much stalking me. I thought okay, which book has 66 chapters?
The book of Isaiah… I went to read the chapter titled True worship, False worship.
If you know the book if Isaiah, the chapter highlights God’s anger towards false worship and importance of true worship
and following the commandments and appointed Sabbaths. I pondered on that…
Then I watched one documentary by accident that highlighted the importance of Sabbath…then bingo!
God is not happy with me that I am not observing the Sabbath!
I started my research on that topic and how it came that we started worshiping on Sunday.
As I dug into the subject, again realization that Catholic church changed that made me angry.
And pretty much all the churches and denominations are following that practice! What a deception!
I decided this was a sign I need to leave the church and start observing the Sabbath, which is Saturday
and not following typical Sunday church observance. And of course, I met with criticism from the church
that I am reading into it wrong, that it is legalism, and that Jesus saved us, so we don’t have to worry about the Law of Moses…
However, it was so black and white to me that God wanted for us to follow His Law.
Why people are rejecting it? I decided to read the Bible from the start and treat it as a new book, without previous perceptions.
To be honest, I didn’t know the Bible very well anyway, so it was easy for me not to have previous preconceptions tided to me.
I only knew the Gospel but not so much the Old Testament. So when I started studying the Old Testament,
this is where I started seeing big differences between what we are being taught at the church and what the Old Testament teaches.
All those questions about why we reject the Law, are we under the new covenant, what Jesus was teaching,
is it really only about his name and grace…?
And this is why I decided to create this blog to answer those questions for myself and with hope that
perhaps it will help someone who had similar experiences to me or is desperately looking for the truth.
With me pointing out on my mistakes, someone will not make the same mistakes and be directed to the truth.
Not to the church truth but to the Bible truth. I came to some controversial for some conclusions,
which only confirmed why I’ve always been against religions, churches and institutions.
And why I could never find a church or denomination that I would feel the closest to.
I have been called heretic many times because I do not follow the standard dogmas and rituals.
Weirdly enough I always hated Christmas…

That is why now I am a big advocate of the law of Moses.
Perhaps the fact that when I was a little girl, my favorite story from the Bible was the story of Moses
and now I am defending the law…it’s coming full circle 😊
I hope you will find my posts interesting, informative and thought provoking. I am not here to agree but to challenge.